Negative Feelings :(

I'm starting to get slightly panicky over this entire IVF process. It's not the needles or the procedures that are freaking me out, but I'm getting an overwhelming feeling that we're going to have paid $15,000 for nothing. That it's not going to work. Everyone wants to be a part of the group for which IVF works the first time. But what if it doesn't? What if my follicles don't grow? What if I only have a few retrieved? Or I have a good retrieval and they all stop growing?  Having to pick up and move on after a failed cycle is terrifying. And those are the thoughts that keep swirling around in my head :( This process is so freaking hard. For those who have done this multiple times I admire you so much.

I also think two of my closest friends having babies is also really starting to get to me. One friend now has a 1.5 week old and my other friend is 31 weeks. Seeing them and hearing them talk about their pregnancies sucks.

I'm going to go look at cat pictures now to cheer up a bit for what is going to be a long work day. This Lupron is making me exhausted (which being my only side effect so far, I'm actually ok with).

Google upside down dogs and try to not smile:

That face:

This is one of the funniest cat videos probably ever:

I hope my work never looks at my internet search history....